8.07.2008

Inadequate Words.

I got an email from a girl I know. I'm not afraid to use the word twitterpated. I am not afraid to say that I love her.

This is so wonderful. My love for her is growing. The weird thing is this: The more I mature as a person, the more I grow in Christ, the more I realize how little I know this girl that I say I love. I see how poorly I made room for her to be a real person to me. I never allowed her to define herself to me. I kept her in a nice, safe, oppressive box. As I allow the mystery of Sara to grow in my mind to better represent the vast human being she is I find that intrigue and fear of the unknown beckoning me. I am inspired to explore her. My confidence in God has allowed me to allow her to be a real person to me, for me to allow her to exist in full. Rather than be fearful of the idea of another person encroaching my on my ego, I am seduced by the possibilities her expansive horizons.

It is a miracle that I am not scared to death of the intensity of loving a real person.

Some might say that it's crazy to say that I'm in love with her even though the shallowness of my previous relations with her are becoming evident. The truth of how little I know her doesn't discourage me because of this single fact: what little I was able to understand about her in my selfish blindness was incredibly noble, beautiful, graceful, stunning, Godly, humble, and selfless. If God so decides that I will get to share my heart with a woman in this life, it, without question, will be hers.

1 comment:

Aftann Kisling said...

David, I'm in awe of the man you have become. Sara is a very lucky girl. Very powerful posts...you should publish them. Share your story and how God has blessed your vision. All the best! ~